Mountain Dew Invitational Summary

            Ever been spelling-challenged? Perhaps (a) you’re a first-generation text-messenger (messager?), (b) you haven’t been at the keyboard for awhile, (c) you’re suffering from sleep deprivation, (d) you’ve had waaay too much caffeine, or (e) you’ve had (c) but not enough (d)?  My moment came the afternoon after this meet. Up at 4:30 am, on the road at five, four hours of crisscrossing the greens of UF’s Bostick Golf Course (what’s my handicap if I do 18 holes without golf clubs?), and chasing interviews instead of a ball with 333 dimples.  Finally back home on the computer, my mind saw a single word on an otherwise blank screen: “Well?”

            That’s when I had a homonym attack. With a story due, my head was suddenly filled too full of dos:  do (past tense, done), double do (an extinct bird), ‘do (need a haircut?), double doo (makes your shoes smell), dew (still on the ground for the first race), Dew (anyone seen one?), doth (Shakespearean derivative), and due (as in deadline).