Lyden's Life Lessons - Our Biggest Bully

Hi! My name is Adair Lyden, a senior at Lake Nona high school. I have been running for seven years now and, over the course of my running career, have developed a deep love for running. While on my journey, I have experienced great hardships. And through the process, I am learning to find myself. Join me in discovering all of the life lessons that can be found in running -- and applying them to different aspects of our lives, so that we not only become successful runners but successful people, as well.

Cross-Country season is officially here! While Florida's rainy weather refuses to accept that fact, we runners keep logging in miles despite the "sunshine state's" stubborn weather patterns.

For me, this week has been kind of emotional -- sappy I know, but I can't help it! Its my last first week of practice after seven years of running! It's crazy for me to think that seven years ago I was a tiny little sixth grader attempting to run a sub-12 mile -- that is, just one mile! It is all coming to an end, but it isn't going to end without a bang!

LAKE NONA SENIOR GIRLS

This past Saturday, my team had a time trial on our XC course. We were joined by some awesome and extremely fast guys and gals from the Dr. Phillips team. While it wasn't raining (thank goodness) it was excruciatingly hot outside, but we all pushed through. I crossed the line at 22:30.

DR. PHILLIPS & LAKE NONA GIRLS - START OF TIME TRIAL

That's four minutes slower than my best. Now hey, for me, that's the best I've been able to run in over a year! That's the thing -- "for me." Those two words are so comforting … but why is that?

The Comparison Trap

I think I found the answer. We constantly get consumed with what others are doing, how others are doing, and how much better they are doing compared to ourselves, that we fail to stop and evaluate our own performance before comparing it to someone else's.

I know I struggle with it. Heck, in this moment, I am probably struggling with comparing myself to someone else. You can be the most confident person in the world, but I can guarantee that at times you are looking at someone else wishing you had what they had, wishing you were as fast as them, wishing you had that scholarship, those muscles, those grades, that social life.

The problem with comparing is that when it's not used to motivate, it's used to destroy. In a way comparing can be beneficial. You are motivated by the person that you are comparing yourself to. You are inspired. But there is thin line that divides motivation from destruction.

Social media doesn't help us either. We in this digital age are so consumed with making our social lives look impeccable. We strive for this perfection, this greatness, that we never feel happy with our performance or lives.

The Bully Within

We aren't proud of ourselves anymore because instead of loving ourselves we take any chance we can to tear our confidence down. We have enough people in this world that try to bring us down so why are we doing it to ourselves? We are our biggest bully.

In my time-trial this weekend, I had two options: I could either be frustrated with myself because I just got creamed by some fast gals from Dr. Phillips. Or, I could be proud that I have run my fastest run in over a year. I had options -- we have options.

But let me tell you, my instinct immediately went to tear myself down. Here I am, a senior trying to get a college scholarship running four minutes slower than my PR early season?

In that split-second I could've been my own bully and ripped my performance to pieces. And I almost did, till I looked at my watch and realized it was still August and that I had time to improve.

We live in a day in age where it's so easy to tear each other down, let alone ourselves. In running we constantly do it. I challenge you during this XC season to find the positives in your performance, to find the positives within yourself -- so we can be our own biggest cheerleader, not our biggest bully. We all have options. Choose the option that builds yourself up for success.

So, run fast, stay strong, keep the faith and remember you are awesome! - Adair

P.S: Thank you Todd and the FLRunners community for always giving me these opportunities as they have made my running journey all the more better! Also shoutout to some awesome Dr. Phillip parents for the pictures! I look forward to a great year!

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